Lawyer is alive without brain

Q: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?" 
A: "No." 
Q: "Did you check for blood pressure?" 
A: "No." 
Q: "Did you check for breathing?"
A: "No." 
Q: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
A: "No." 
Q: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?" 
A: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar." 
Q: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?" 
A: "It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."

new theory

The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.

Memo for students hahahaha

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